A Change.

JAkkermans_clusters_webA change is coming.

I’ve been pretty quiet on here lately, I’m aware.  I’ve been re-thinking, re-evaluating, and re-prioritizing my life.  I’ve decided to give up a big commitment in my life, which was very important to me, but was causing an imbalance in my life, taking too much of my energy away from other things.  I am cutting back to the bare bones, refocusing on what is most important- my health, and my practice.  It has not been an easy decision to make, and one that definitely has aspects that I will miss, but a necessary one.  I need to focus on my personal work, my plans and goals, and work to make those happen, keeping from getting bogged down in the details of life.

I am excited for the change, nervous, but a little bit reluctant.  Letting go of the old to make room for the new takes a bit of faith. It means giving up a lot the good things as well as the not-so-good.  I’m sad about that, but ready to move on to what’s next.

I don’t know exactly what will happen in the next few months, only that I needed to reposition myself, a slight redirection, as I wasn’t headed where I’d like to go.  I also need a break for my health.  In the next little while, I will spend some time allowing myself to relax, work, and hopefully find my spark again.  I will put no pressure on myself for a certain length of time.  Let it become fun again.  Be social.  Explore.  Take field trips.

This is a period of transition, of realignment.  I think I’ve learned something, and it’s a reminder for me to focus on what’s most important.  (If you don’t make a decision about what’s best for you, who will?)  Only I know what’s best for me, only I know what I want, and ultimately, I am responsible for my own life and my own choices.  The details are just details, but the larger pieces are ever so important to get right.  I’ve gotta decide for myself what my priorities are, and honour them.

I’m committing, universe.

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